Changes.

Before I get started, I'd like to say thank you to my wife, Jodi. for standing beside me through all that we have gone through. I wish she knew exactly how much it means to me, even though I don't say it enough. I want to thank her for supporting me in my decisions that I've made and know that I'll hope to repay her soon. I love you so much, thank you!!

With that being said, I want to let you all in on something that has been going on in my life. After thinking long and hard and after much debate, on October 26, 2012 I had gastric bypass surgery. More specifically Roux-en-Y surgery. It might come as a shock to some, maybe some will say its about time, but I'm extremely happy I had it done.

All my life I've been fat kid, I was born over 10 pounds. I have never been a normal size ever in my life. So after many years of diets that didn't work and bad habits that I couldn't break, I took a big step in my life and had surgery. Many people will say it was the "easy way out" for me. Many people will be mad because I wasn't upfront with them about the surgery. Many people truthfully won't care I had it done. To be honest, I'm fine with that. It's been 10 years since my first doctor recommended I get the surgery. 10 years of, nah I won't be this big for ever. 10 years of wondering what it'd be like to not be so big. Well soon I won't have to wonder.

I finally took the right step for a healthier me and I'm finally happy. I can't pin point as to why I was so big in the first place. Maybe it was eating only Mac and cheese and hot dogs as a kid? Maybe it was eating a large pizza by myself in one night as an adult? I take comfort in food apparently. I just don't know why. Maybe it was when my mom said I should put a shirt on when I wanted to swim in my cousins pool, so as to not embarrass myself in front of everyone. Maybe it was from when I felt sick walking past the group of girls that use to hang out near the entrance doors of the middle school everyday because they all would make fun of me. I still fucking hate the ring leader of that group to this day. I don't know. It could be a combination of it all. I do know that I don't want to be embarrassed over my weight anymore. I don't ever want people to go on and on about how much I should be able to eat when I say no thank you to having seconds at a meal. Or having people defend me against other people because they are rude or because their kids make fun of me. I don't ever want the people around me, or myself for that matter, to ever have to deal with that again. I'll say this, if it ever happens again, as of this date, December 8th, I promise I will embarrass that person until they cry or punch me. I'm not backing down for anyone anymore. I've had enough of being made fun of and not being able to do the things I want for the last 30 years. From here on out its about me and my wife and kids.

So I should end this soon. I've gone on this rant for too long. What I wanted to accomplish in this "blog" was to let everyone in and to let you know why I chose this path to go on. I felt like I had no other option and I want to see my kids grow up. That's basically why. If after reading this, you no longer want to be a friend of mine, fine. If you want to support me in this, awesome! I will keep posting in this blog for a little while and if it seems to keep people interested, I'll go even longer. The next one I write will probably be about the surgery and the process I went through with that. I promise not to be as long winded as I have with this one. A big thank you goes to my wife again. She has been amazing through this! Another thank you goes to John Basedow and Derek Poundstone. Those guys have been great with any questions I have ever had about nutrition and exercise. Follow them and hit them up on twitter (@johnbasedow and @derekpoundstone). That's where I go to talk to them. Also a big thank you goes to Derek for letting me call his siriusXm radio show about my surgery as well! And to John for giving me his Fitness Made Simple book, a great read for anyone struggling with weight! Also another big thank you goes out to the SiriusXm Radio show I listen to for 5 years now, Covino and Rich, channel 104 (@covinoandrich on twitter).They have been great to me and always entertaining. I appreciate them letting me talk on air about the surgery and other shit that has gone on in my life. And to all the C and R listeners that have been there for me. I truly appreciate it and I hope one of these years I can make it to a DBC sometime! Thanks again for reading this. If anyone has questions, feel free to ask.

Oh and one last thing about the pics below. The one with me in the black shirt was from 2 years ago. I weighed roughly 430lbs there. The one with me in the white shirt was taken a week ago and I was at 336lbs. That shirt I got when I was a senior in high school 12 years ago. I could never wear that shirt before. It's a little tight there, but at least my gut isn't hanging out like it did before when I put it on. As of today, I weigh 329lbs. Which would have been my Sophomore weight. I use to be afraid to say my weight, ashamed to say what i really weighed. now i don't mind that much because i know I'm never going back! Tell me again why I shouldn't have did this surgery? Thanks again!